Gerard's Choir Concert

Attended Gerard's Choir Concert tonight. Way to go bro (:

I have no qualms about supporting friends for their concerts because I would like them to do the same for me. It means so much to a performer for the people they care about to support them, visibly.

Sometime back I chanced upon Lizzy's blog entry on the 2006 MEP concert (yes I googled my name, again) and I remember being touched, again, by what she said. Those very same people supported me again in 2007 - plus Rajesh that time - and yes, I thank all of you from the very bottom of my heart once again. TJ MEP gave me the experience of a lifetime and opened my eyes to so many things.

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On a random note, I was in the middle of the hymns that I realised how magical the VOICE was as the source of all music and how all musical instruments in the world essential were created with the aim of emulating or even surpassing the VOICE as the mode of music production. The closest that comes to it are the wind instruments, but even then the brilliance of the flute or the piccolo fails to tingle the strings of the heart, like a plaintive hymn or soulful song. The human voice is truly remarkable.
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I was at the concert with Petrina and Stephanie! I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY ARE BACK FROM THE UK SO SOON. anyway, no one will be seeing me until the summer of my 2nd year. I will be travelling before that! touring the world and stuff. It's good to see them again (:

God its only now when my friends resurface themselves that I realise once again how isolated I am and how much I miss them. I feel horribly socially inept now, just a mere robot incapable of meaningful conversation. I feel disengaged and distant, as if I've lost all semblance of a connection and unable to string the right words together to express the right idea. It seemed like it was just not too long ago when I sat in the MCYS canteen talking to steph on my HP about MCYS, the PSC psychological interview and stuff, or running around the isle during SYC with gerard, pet and others. There were laughter and there were tears. I remember Steph's farewell. The cheers, the songs, the goodwill and the parting smiles. She was surrounded by a whole entourage and was loved for being who she was. It seemed only yesterday that G was talking to me about his crush, or the time we studied in the National Library and me just embarking on my preliminary study of Benjamin Britten's Curlew River.

Where did all the time go?
Where did all the friendship go?

What happened to all those friends whom were close and where did all the closeness and friendship go to? They become locked away in a box deep within the subconscious, forgotten until perhaps the time when one faces the white tunnel into eternity and never-ever.

Friends come and go Weiyang says. I wonder if I have been an irresponsible friend playing that part in the lives of others as well. For many, we simply grew apart. A change in thinking. A new life, a new environment, a new destiny. Some, we choose to avoid and distance. For some, it was just not meant to be. Their hearts and minds remained somewhere else, transfixed onto another.

Perhaps it is just life. C'est la vie! Separation. Meeting. The twin curses of living. Many take it forgranted. To them it's not worth a second thought. But I desist in having to treat it as a mere 'normality'. In a life full of separation, it is oft thought that that person would have been long immune to it. Perhaps they are too busy with their own lives and their own world to realise. I don't.I refuse to accept it. I want to feel for every single relationship and person in my life, be it for good and bad. Everybody is special and means something to me. Only the most abhorrent of traits and character can make me turn against them.

Therefore in a most serendipitous way, I love.

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Dear friend, far off, my lost desire,
So far, so near in woe and weal;
O loved the most, when most I feel
There is a lower and a higher;

Known and unknown; human, divine;
Sweet human hand and lips and eye;
Dear heavenly friend that canst not die,
Mine, mine, for ever, ever mine;

Strange friend, past, present, and to be;
Loved deeplier, darklier understood;
Behold, I dream a dream of good,
And mingle all the world with thee.

CXXIX, In Memoriam A.H.H, Alfred Lord Tennyson

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But who will love me?